Much Needed

I had one of those mornings today.

One of those "what the hell am I doing???" mornings.

One of those mornings where I am grabbed around the neck by the fear that I've made the wrong decisions...the wrong choices...that I've wasted time...that I'm going nowhere...that I'm well on my way to becoming a failure as a person.

Not as a mother. 

But as me.  Whoever that's supposed to be.

I'm working on it. 

But anyway, I gave myself a few short reminders.  Things to think about. 

Like...

"Look neither to the right nor to the left."

I have no idea if that's a real quote from somewhere.

But basically, it's my way of reminding myself not to check on anyone else's progress and just to focus on my own.  Not to compare myself - and find myself lacking in the process.  But just to keep going forward.

And another one...

"Just do something."

That one used to be the slogan I borrowed from Nike - "Just do it." 

But IT can be daunting, because it's ALL of IT.

And that's a big bite.

And so rather than paralyzing myself with the order to JUST DO IT, I am trying to keep myself going by just doing SOMETHING toward that IT.  Each day.

Even when I'm overflowing with doubt and self criticism.  And, you know, fear. 

And so I resolved to do something today.

I was in the kitchen - my office, sort of - checking email and other blogs.

And - entirely by surprise - I came across this post on Red Pony Farm.

Entirely by surprise.

I stared at the screen and felt my heart and spirit lift a bit. 

I SO needed that today.  So very much.

Thank you, Edna Leigh Libby, for writing that kind post.

It helped me today.   

Comments

[Tracie]

You don't know me and I have never commented before, but I agree with Ms. Libby. I enjoy reading you too!!!

[Veronica]

Wow! Congrats! I'm so glad that more people are recognizing you for the AMAZING writer/storyteller/cook/person (mother/friend... I could go on!) you are. You deserve it.

[The Chick Voice]

Well if you are looking for more uplifting thoughts, let me help out. I too, am overwhelmed by how wonderful your blog is. The writing is great and the pictures are amazing. I am amazed at the variety and beauty of the cooking and baking you do. You are so inspiring!! Can't imagine who you might be tempted to compare yourself with but you should be confident the work of art you have created with your blog!